Unlikely Hero: Who am I?

In the name of God I write,

It took me some time to write this next blog entry because I simply had to process what God was doing with me and through me. I couldn't take for granted the readers or the blessed gift of writing. So I prayed and allowed God to put this next entry in me so that I could write what He wrote in my heart.

And although I truly believe this was a personal triumph for me to reveal myself and tell my personal story, I was reminded recently by a dear brother and friend that we oft times look to save ourselves or focus only on what we are going through and forget that we are saviours. As believers in God, He has chosen us to be supernatural and He has chosen us to bear the cross of being the true super hero.


Being a child, the lil' princess felt like the environment she was growing up in was quite normal. Seeing her mother go out on most nights and not come in until the wee hours, hearing her uncles argue with her grandmother about finances and choices she thought was best, fighting her brother just to be left alone and enduring abuse because she was too scared to say, "Stop!" For her, this was normal and for her, this was her family. She was just happy to have a family and have some kind of sanctuary. Yet she knew instinctively that this was not normal and often thought that her life was some one else's. She would imagine that she was adopted and that her real parents would show up and whisk her away from all of this madness. She would envision that she was the main character in the popular television series The Brandy Bunch, and maybe her mother would get married and all their problems would be solved. But unbeknowest to her, God was allowing these tragedies to become a major triumph and He was setting the stage for her greatness. She didn't suspect that the Master Planner had a major plan with her in mind.

So the years passed and the lil' princess grew. It was now the mid 1980's and Jane Byrne was going out and a new man lead politics in Chicago, Mayor Harold Washington. He was the first Black Mayor Chicago had ever witnessed. A new genre of music was being birth called Rap which they later termed as Hip Hop and Micheal Jackson was the King of the Music Video sagas. Every one had a Thriller jacket and a white glove, and guess what? So did the lil' princess and prince. They would anxiously rush over to the their friends house to go in the back of the yard to see if anyone threw away some card board boxes. Once they eyed a box, the boys broke it down and it miraculously turned into a dance floor. Out of no where another boy would magically appear with a boom box, that's a very large portable radio for those who may not understand. They turned the music up loud and began to perform acrobatic stunts. Back then they called it break-dancing and everyone on the block was doing it. The lil' princess and her brother found something that brought them together....dancing. Even though to others it seemed trivial, to them it was a release from thinking about their mother and the situations that they had to endure at home.

Life with The Queen was going somewhat well and they now had a new found sense of stability. The Queen continued ministering on Sunday mornings and the lil' princess continue to watch her grandmother be used as a willing vessel for God. She noticed the transformation that came over her grandmother while she stood firmly behind the pulpit. She listened at the responses of the congregation when her grandmother said something that stirred up the spirit of the people in the room. She also noticed a peculiar happening when the drummer would beat the top of his drum with his drum sticks and the piano playing chiming in on cue as these women would run down the aisle of the church as if something strange had jumped down their dresses. She thought maybe they were just happy or maybe they just wanted to dance, but to her it seemed oddly different and she wanted no parts of it. The "it" was called the Holy Ghost and it frightened the lil' princess every time she witness such act.

She begin to ask more and more questions of her grandmother about the strange happenings at the church and why did people have to do certain things. She began to become more curious about this man they called Jesus and wondered where he was. Most importantly, who was he? If grandmomma said he had hair like lamb's wool then why did she have a picture of another man whose hair was straight and long and who was obviously not the complexion of burnished brass? If grandmomma said we should love one another even as Jesus loved us, then why did their family continue to be so unloving towards each other and why did love look so painful? She began to see the myriad of contradictions in what she heard on Sunday mornings and what she saw on Monday evenings. Something didn't add up, and although she was young she was not too blind to see that grandmother left out many pieces to the puzzle of life. Nonetheless, she loved her grandmother so.

The lil' princess, however, missed her mother dearly. And although her life with her mom wasn't perfect, this still was her mother and all she wanted was to soon be re-united with her. She would get so excited with hopes of her mother visiting and often cried a stream of tears on realizing that she would not stay long for the visit. "Momma is busy," so she would say, and she had to go and take care of business. The lil' princess only wanted her mother to stay with her and be the mother that she wished and hoped she would be to her young children. The lil' princess didn't understand how God could be so cruel that He would not allow her a relationship with her mother. She saw her grandmother trying to be the best example and she saw her mother trying hard to battle accepting being a parent, but it still was so confusing. But she was unaware of a hidden truth; that God was in the midst of it all. The lil' princess didn't know and understand the why and the how of her life, but she would soon find out that God was going to transform her situation and allow her to gain the strength to become supernatural.

What she was unaware of was the important fact that this life that she seemed to despise so much was her training ground to amplify her super abilities and propel her into hero status in the twinkling of an eye. The little princess was being granted access into the process of what makes a human being into a person with extraordinary powers. All she had to do was continue to be patient and let the process do what it's design to do.

More next time, God willing...

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